Guest Post by RA Perumal

What is it that you really want?

Many people have been asked this question. Sometimes, the answer is ‘Happiness’. On occasion, depending on respondents, the answer is ‘Peace’. But ultimately, whether you want a big house, an aeroplane, loads of money, or even peace, the hope is that these things will eventually make us happy.

But how do we become happy? Is happiness just an unattainable dream, or perhaps a desire that one need to become a monk to really find? While I am not disputing that the latter is a viable approach, many religions also advocate the possibilities of attaining happiness whilst being engaged in one’s present activities.

So, what do I have to do differently to be happier?

“A calm and modest life brings more happiness than the pursuit of success combined with constant restlessness.”

So said Einstein, one of the brainiest people this world has ever seen.

This quote suggests that to be happier, you must pursue a life that has constraints on desires, as opposed to one with a constant need to change and possibly improve the present situation.

Could this be right? Doesn’t conventional wisdom tell us that if we don’t keep moving forward, we will be left behind?

Contentment

One of the least understood words I’ve come across is ‘Contentment’…yet it is probably one of the most important words in human life as well. Simply put, it means knowing when or where to stop with the accumulation of additional unnecessary material wealth for oneself.

Contentment begins with the satisfaction of needs. Everyone is controlled by needs - theorised by Maslow as physiological, security, social, esteem and self-actualization. When one level of needs are satisfied, we aspire to satisfy the next level of need. For example, when one has found suitable accommodation, one tends to insure it against possible damages i.e. from physiological to security. In a dynamic setting, however, many people may be moving up from varying levels simultaneously, satisfying different needs. For example, from physiological to security, whilst at the same time moving from security to social when purchasing a branded shoe to look good.

When one begins to think of quenching one’s thirst by drinking a coke, a bee,r or a latte, one is giving in to wants. We could have easily quenched our thirst (a physiological need) by drinking water. Instead, we give in to a want which costs us a lot more. While this might seem like a small example, such expenditure across many fronts makes one use up funds which could be applied elsewhere in more meaningful ways. This is not to say that one has to always buy the cheapest thing around, but instead that we should seek to buy the best available solution to satisfy our needs rather than wants.

Consumerism does not make it easy for an individual to avoid these minefields that go after his pocket, but resilience in the face of such an onslaught does makes one happier. While it may not appear so in the short term by forgoing instant gratification, we see it very clearing in the longer run. If we are able to focus our minds in making everyday purchases based on need, it eventually becomes a habit that pays off multiple fold in our contentment and happiness.

It is a happier man that knows what he needs and does not give in to the temptations preached by talented marketers.